In Defense of YA Romance

I've been reading a lot of posts lately about the poor depiction of romance in YA lit. More ostensibly, the way women are treated as weak objects desperately needing to be saved by a boy. While I do agree that some YA romances embarrass me- that people think abuse and downright stalking is how love really is and/or should be, there are many romances in YA lit out there that I think are done really well, don't degrade women, and satisfy that sweet tooth for a romantic read that so many of us have.

Here's some pondering points I have:

1. It's OKAY to like romance. It's okay to fall for the gorgeous guy who makes you melt with his smile. It's okay that the female character's self-esteem is invariably raised after meeting him. It's the human experience, it's what we do! And, in most of the novels I read (that I enjoy) the female becomes friends with the gorgeous guy before there's any romance. Which, is the "right" thing to do-and is OKAY.

2. Sometimes I think that people (especially some girls nowadays who think they are feminists) believe that any kind of weakness is BAD BAD BAD. But hey guess what? We are human. We have weaknesses. We fall in love (girls AND guys). And falling in love should not be considered a weakness. I know we as women are tired of being considered the weaker sex-but the way to gain exposure as strong, self-sufficient women isn't to completely ignore the fact that hey, we have emotions. We should embrace them (not abuse them).

Did I cry during The Notebook? Absolutely. Still do. Does that make me a push-over? Or weak? Absolutely not. And be sure to know if a guy ever hit me, verbally abused me, stalked me, or made me feel any type of way inferior to him he would be done, out the door. See you, man, that's not for me.

3. I don't buy the Sarah Dessen Syndrome. I'm not knocking whoever coined the phrase-if that's how you feel, that's how you feel. However, I think she deserves a little defense coming her way. I LOVE Sarah Dessen. She pulled me into reading. Do all of her books revolve around some type of romance? Yes. Do all of her female characters have some type of issue? Yes. Do all of her female characters need a guy to resolve her issues? No. Of course the female character will fall for someone (it wouldn't be a romance if she didn't...duh) and of course the character is going to have worked through her issue(s) in some way (it's called resolution).

In Lock and Key, the female character actually realizes that her male counterpoint needs more help than she does. And where does she get the help for herself? Most importantly through her family. And in Dreamland, her boyfriend absolutely isn't the one solving her problems-he's creating them! And she totally ditches him in order to be rehabilitated. I think Sarah Dessen is brilliant. I like reading real romances where each character is flawed. But it wouldn't be a novel if they stayed stagnantly flawed through til the end. Each of her characters goes through a journey and makes a discovery. Which includes romance, but also includes learning more about themselves.

And that is again, OKAY.

I do agree that there is some sort of weird paranormal romance cliche floating around in so many new books for teens. That's what they enjoy reading...why? Well, I'm not sure, that's a topic for another post. However, I don't think this brand of awful YA romance is cause to hate on all YA romance. I think sometimes we confuse the ideas of bad romance influencing teenagers and romance influencing teenagers. Don't let the stories about sparkly vampires watching you sleep make you pass on the novels about real teenagers falling in love.

And that is my argument. Thoughts?




Happy Reading!

The Right Not to Finish a Book

This begs the question, why do we read? Personally, I read because it's enjoyable. When I read it's a time where I can relax and get lost in a world that isn't my own. Therefore, I don't think it's wrong to abandon a book if it isn't giving you the pleasure you intended. However, whenever I put a book down I'm left feeling guilty and empty. I feel guilty because I started a journey that I'm not going to finish and so I feel like a quitter. But I know I shouldn't feel like that because there are so many books out there, there's no way one person is going to enjoy all of them! There shouldn't be any crime in trying to find a book that you will enjoy and it isn't probable that every book you pick up will be one you enjoy.

There's something so exciting about reading an author you love or waiting for the next book in a series you love. When you open that cover there are tingles and flutters and it's oftentimes hard to sit still to actually begin reading because you're so excited! And as a reader, I'm constantly looking for that "rush". Of course, if I made a commitment to review a book that I started and didn't like I'll finish it because that's different. But if I pick up a book at a library and I'm having trouble getting through it, I'll stop reading.

Because I don't want there to come a time when reading isn't enjoyable. And this brings me to another issue- a lot of kids reach that time so early! Before they even get halfway through high school they shove off reading and I think part of the reason why is that they've never found anything enjoyable to read! So the reason they stop reading a book is more blinding then say, when you or I stop. Because we know there are other books out there that we'll love, kids don't necessarily know that. That's why I think it needs to start in the classroom, when reading is required. Teachers need to start feeding kids things they will find enjoyable and give them lots of choices! It will be easier for them later to read Romeo and Juliet and ensure that if they put a book down it's because they're going to find another one.

Here are some of my book turn on/offs:

Book Turn Offs: bad writing, too many characters with names I can't pronounce, fantasy that creates worlds so unlike the one we're in that it's hard to relate, heavy-hitting issues (like Touching Snow-I couldn't finish it because it made me so, so sad I couldn't bear it any longer), stereotypical characters, predictable plots.

Book Turn Ons: Original ideas, writing that takes me through a book not knowing I'm actually reading, realistic romance, relatable characters, humor interspersed throughout a novel, surprises, well-developed characters.

So what do you guys think about not finishing a book? What are some of your book turn on/offs? I'd love to see your on blog post on this idea!

Happy Reading!